New Year, new start. I’ve been playing the trombone for a couple of years now and, while it still seems presumptuous to call myself a ‘musician’, it has, in a strange way, taken over my life.

I certainly didn’t foresee this happening when I took my daughter along for her first cornet lesson, courtesy of a local brass band. I’d taken a book and was looking forward to having a bit of ‘me time’ while she got on with making strangled-cow noises. I did not expect to be blowing my own trumpet (as it were), too.

Actually, it wasn’t really a trumpet – brass bands don’t ‘do’ trumpets; they’re considered too shrill – but I wasn’t clear on the distinction in those days. I ended up bringing home a cornet, too – a battered, dented, dinted thing that had the water valve held on with Blu-Tack – and over the next week, the daughter and I competed to make the best strangled-cow noises.

That was a couple of Christmases ago. Since then we’ve plodded painfully through A Tune a Day getting slowly better, though neither of us stuck with the cornet.  We could only make farmyard bleats and honks with it – the small mouthpiece doesn’t suit everyone – so she graduated to the baritone and then the euphonium and I settled on the trombone.

I knew, as soon as I lifted the trombone to my lips and played my first tune with the slide (all the other brass instruments have valves) that this was the instrument for me. It was instant attraction, love at first sight, a weirdly connected feeling like spotting a stranger on the other side of a crowded room and knowing that you’re meant to be together.

Not that it’s been an easy relationship. But then the course of true love rarely runs smoothly. Trombones are, in truth, bloody difficult. Not only do you have to cope with getting the right pitch, which you do by altering the shape of your lips (your ‘embouchure’), which is common to all brass instruments, but you also have to learn the slide positions that correspond to the notes since there are no visible gradations.

There are other problems, too: they can be heavy to hold, clunky to wield and a bugger to blow – I’m still told I’m not loud enough – plus it’s hard to slur the notes (called ‘legato’ tonguing) without sounding like one of those slide whistles they used on The Clangers. It’s OK if you want a comedy effect – and the poor old trombone often gets stereotyped as such – but, unless you’re playing The Acrobat, all that glissing up and down the slide makes you sound like a drunk.

Still, I like a challenge. And I like the fact that the trombone’s different. It’s also, to me, the most flexible of the brass instruments – you can play jazz, classical, swing and big band on it and groovy beats like reggae, latin and even hip-hop (check out Youngblood), as well as the traditional brass band stuff.

I love brass-band playing, to the extent that I’m actually in two bands now; a delicate feat to pull off in the political world of banding and one that I might yet not survive. And, as if going out three nights a week to do that isn’t enough (carolling at Christmas this year got very complicated), I’m also experimenting with jazz – I’ve been to a couple of scary-but-fun jazz improvisation workshops for ‘late learners’ – and am about to join in with a trombone ‘choir’. I also take private lessons with a trombone tutor and am working towards my grade 5 exam in three months’ time.

So where’s it all heading? Most trombonists are well established and have been playing all their lives. They are predominantly male, too. You do see a few girls playing them, but it’s not common, particularly at a higher level. The chances of a 48-year-old, perimenopausal woman making it professionally, particularly when she only started a couple of years ago, are slim. Actually, I believe it’s unheard of.

Still, as I said, I like a challenge. And I’m aiming high. This year I want to get really good, pass that exam, learn the bass clef (brass bands always teach trombone in the treble clef; to play most other kinds of music I need to be able to read bass clef) and sound like a ‘proper’ trombonist and not a wimpy girl.

By the time I’m 50, I want to be play in something really significant – a big band, or a jazz band – and feel like I’ve made my mark. I’m not looking to break the mould but to crack it a bit would be good.

So this is the journey I’m going on, and I thought I’d keep a record of it for my own amusement, and because it might help other beginner trombonists. According to a book I bought the other day (How Trombonists Do It) you need to be able to control your glottis, too. No-one’s ever mentioned that to me before. I’m not even sure I know where mine is. I’ll keep you posted.